Thursday, 2 August 2007

Talking Sex

Do you contact your friends the moment you've exited a sex scene and tell them of success/disappointment, grandness/petiteness, the rating of his kissing prowess, the overall raunch, or failure to launch? Or do you keep it to yourself or reveal it in stages, and in the right places?

When I first entered the gay scene it seemed all everyone talked about was sex. And in detail, explicit detail. While sometimes that was quite a lot of fun, it seemed to me that it brought the whole thing of sex and people and relationships into a commodity. People became rated according to their varying sexual capacities, performance, and size. A thing of numbers and stats. But where I came from - one didn't speak of such things - in fact - one didn't speak about sex at all. So early on The Frenchman and I decided that we didn't want to talk about sex so openly. We wanted to keep something for 'just us'.

Talking about sex though, is something that can be quite liberating, and at times a lot of fun. Discussion with close friends about such things can certainly strengthen relationships and break down barriers that we've held up for so long. But how much is too much? What should we keep to ourselves? And what do our sexual partners expect of us on these matters?


Tom Cat of Bondi Beach said...

Whilst I agree it is special to keep it between the 2 of you - but at other times it can be so liberating and hilarious to divulge the ultimately bizarre that sex can be.

brenton said...

In my very humble opinion it all comes down to the connection between the sexual partners and the relationship with the friends.
I'll happily speak about casual encounters (see last weeks escapades and our conversations) but if I met someone I thought had potential to become someone specail, I'm hardly going to tell all my friends about what he's good or bad at.
Everyone needs to define their own limits and boundaries!

brenton said...

P.S. LOVE the photos!

Spamouflage said...

I don't kiss and tell. But I don't have good gay friends either. One of the things I love about my straight guy friends: they talk about tits for three minutes but then it's back to making fun of each other. Love that. It would be nice to go to a gay bar and dish out but that's a luxury I don't have anymore. Unless I board a plane and go to Montreal!!

Single Guy said...

The funny thing is my straight friends are the ones that want me to talk to them about sex!!! they like havin a gay boy talk dirty to them!

Francoism said...

Single guy: I wish but alas not so much.