Wednesday, 4 April 2007

Sex is best when it's one on.....?

If we listen to the George Michael from the "I want your Sex" days then sex is best when it's one on one. But is it? Or is it best when it's one on two or three or four, or more? When less is more - is more morer?

I spoke with a former monk, "Scott," today. After leaving the monastic life Scott did a 180 and sex became a major part of his life. He had sex with multiple partners, and he very much enjoyed it. But ultimately he found it was too unbalanced for him. He’d left one extreme for another. Now he's embarking on a more settled life with just one partner, and he seems very happy with his choice.

As gay men we have the possibility of a whole other world than the yellow brick road that society expects of our heterosexual counterparts. If you're outside the norm on being gay - well, you might as well make up your own rules on everything else too?

While it's not always the case we have generally less entanglements with the whole sex thing. One or two or three partners in sex are often discussed and many of you will know of relationships where there are three partners living together. I personally know of 2 (although they're not close friends of mine), and while it's not for me, at least not right now- it does seem to work for them.

But bring up the topic and there will be a wide variety of reactions. Some people will claim the more the merrier, others find the whole idea abominable, some are curious but not quite sure how to go about doing it. Are you thinking less or more? Or are you still unsure?


Geoff & Terry said...

Hey Trev

Well it looks like it is buy in time for me finally to post a comment for your blog...first of all love the site and the pics...

I guess the question that begs, is whether we are just talking about sex or relationships with multiple partners? There is a great book called "The Ethical Slut - A guide to infinite sexual possibilities" by Dossie Easton that is well worth the read. It really explores lots of possibilities from polyamorous relationships to f*@k buddies and everything in between. Some very interesting perspectives on how to redefine love and sex in a spectrum of sexual possibilities. Certainly you can read it for what you need to take from it, but it has made a suprisingly big impact on my relationship and how I love the men in my life.

Trevor said...

Thanks Mr Vancouver (Geoff),
I guess while I'm looking at all the permutations and combinations, the focus is more on sex than relationships, but everyone out there has their own experiences and opinions so the more discussion the better. Sounds like an interesting read by the way!

Craig said...

T.Q: Sex is best when it's one on...?

C.A: .. the hour, every hour?

C x

lynnette said...

hehehehe. ditto what craig said.